I am alive and well. 

I try to put my heart on paper.

            Osama Alomar

This quote emphasizes what I want to do with this blog. Complete transparency. Hard topics include my statement of mental illness. I have been deeply depressed. This has lifted, thank god. I struggle with schizophrenia, but still live a good life. Daily symptoms include hearing sounds and voices that no one else hears, paranoia, lack of concentration, and a bad memory. These things are manageable and don’t steal from me a fabulous life.

You might say how do you manage your symptoms? I take medication that works for me. It took many years to get the right cocktail of drugs. As it is, I haven’t been hospitalized for 14 years. I used to go in and out of hospitals for short stays every month and wasn’t med compliant. Today, I take my pills as prescribed. I try to get 12 hours of sleep every night. I’m not always successful with this. I have started waking at 4 to go to the gym before my day starts two times a week. Three more times per week, I’m up by seven and go to the gym around eight o’clock. I maintain working 18 ours a week at the public library. I have been working there for 13 years with less than seven days absent that entire time. My life is extremely scheduled. My roommate jokes that she could set a clock by me. I eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner at the same time. And I eat the same things everyday which makes grocery shopping easy. Nothing is cooked but eggs. The rest is oatmeal and salad. This does not bore me or my taste buds. Occasionally, I have white cake with butter cream frosting and donuts; I love them!

Most of my free time I spend reading, writing, and petting my cats. I have two black cats. I can tell them apart because they have different personalities and their eyes, although both yellow, are different. Yesterday, Annie, clawed me, tried to bite me, and hissed at me. In short, she freaked out. I was trying to clip her front claws. After clipping one paw, she went ballistic on me. It was terrible. Due to trauma, I thought she might ignore me. Fortunately, she came out of the closet at bedtime and jumped on my chest, purring. She remained calm while I clipped her other paw.

Thank you for your time in reading this. It brings me joy.

Previous
Previous

Some Believe the Comatose Can Hear

Next
Next

Washing the Moldy Blanket